Is this a Reality show?

So here are a few more of the funny things my kids say/do:

Tyler recently got new glasses. As the woman fit them to his face he turned and looked in the little oval mirror that sits on the table. Then says, "Well hello Mr. Huff." We were totally laughing. I love that guy!

The other day my sitter was putting Max down for a nap. We turn the light off by the string hanging off the light on the ceiling. This way the boys can't just get up and turn the wall switch on all the time. Well, this is not a problem for me as I am 5'8" but my sitter is 5'4". She was jumping to get the string and Max says, "Tammy. CHAIR." Like, duh. HAHAHA

This is for all you Veggie Tales lovers out there: Tia was saying she didn't want to go to sleep because she was scared. Tyler said, "Don't be scared Tia. God is bigger than the boogie man." To which Tia said, "Oh, your right Tyler." I laughed but you know, it worked.

So my allergies have been horrible lately. I woke up and was sneezing and sneezing. Tia asked if I was sick and I told her I think I have allergies. She said with great concern, "Oh no. I hope you're not allergic to Roxy!" Now friends, you need to know who Roxy is to make this story funny. Roxy is Tia's IMAGINARY cat! I assured her I was NOT allergic to Roxy.

Now this one I had to wait to tell until was actually laughable to me. Others could laugh much earlier at this story than I could. So here goes:
We had an exchange student for 2 weeks during the summer from China. Sweet 14 year old girl who did not speak much English. I woke up the first morning she was here a little before 6 to get the boys. I noticed Tia's bedroom door was open and neither she or our student were in there. I got the boys and as I came into the front room I noticed the front door wide open. As the anxiety began I looked quickly around the house and didn't see them. So I went outside with a boy in each hand and call for Tia. No answer. (Anxiety mounting) Then our student comes running around the corner. Here's the conversation: (She's JR)
JR: Tia at park. She need help. I help one, I help two, I cannot help anymore. I come to get you mom.
Me: Tia's at the park now?
JR: Yes.
Me: And you are HERE?
JR: Yes.
(Anxiety changed to panic)
I run inside, wake Kevin up and tell him Tia's alone at the park, here's the boys, gotta go.
I take off running for the park. JR is running and only speaking Chinese quietly. (Probably praying I don't kick her out. Poor girl.)
So, I round the corner to the park which is about 2 blocks away, I see Tia. And my anxiety decreases. Hooray for that.

So, what is Tia doing? She is completely wedged in the baby swing. Feet dangling. PJ's on, bare feet hanging. Legs lodged in the holes up to the fold where the thigh meets the hip. You know the swings with the four holes for babies? Well, they are really for babies!!! So let's recap: Tia convinced JR to unlock the door and take her to the park-- before 6 am--while everyone is sleeping. Then she convinced her to put her into the baby swing. Now she can't get out. Her body weight apparently pushed her into the holes but because she was all the way past her thighs, there was NO getting her out. I pulled and JR held the swing but it was never gonna happen.
At this point, what are the choices? I call Kevin who does not answer his phone. So, I tell Tia and JR we will have to call the Fire Dept. JR doesn't understand so I say, "Police." She gets this terrified look and says, "For me?" Seriously, people this is her 1st day in America!!! This poor girl! I know she was just being nice and following my daughter's lead. My daughter with NO concern for safety or danger apparently NOT the best to follow.

So, I do call the Fire Dept. and Kevin eventually answers and loads the boys in the car to come see if there is anything he can do. As he is loading the boys, Tyler asks where they are going. Daddy tells him they are going to help Tia who is stuck in a swing at the park. Tyler then says, "This is Serious." (Wonder Pet fans will get that.)
I was glad Kevin came because the F.D. went around the corner to where I could hear the truck but not see them and they could not see us. Kev ran over and redirected them. I say them. Yes, all 5 of them get out of the truck. People, I am in PJ's. It is not attractive. It is barely 6am. My daughter has left the house without my knowledge and is stuck in a swing. I'm a tad humiliated!

I joke with them about it being a slow morning for them and tell them the situation. And yes, they had to take HUGE cutters of some kind and cut the swing up both sides to get her out. So if anyone in my neighborhood is reading this and wondering why one of the swings was cut and cursing the teenagers that must have done it---it was us. Sorry.

So how was Tia you ask? Does this tell you? "Thank you firefighters! Thank you so much for saving me firefighters! You're my best friends firefighters!" Social butterfly to the tee. But her legs were fine. A bit bruised but fine.
I came home and was ready to crawl into bed for 24 hours as my adrenaline crashed. But no, it was only 6:15 am the day was yet to begin...

So now let's vote? Who wants to trade lives? Liars! You just want to be a fly on my wall and watch the mass chaos that is our life. I love it but I need a therapist! Hahaha Seriously, I know that morning could have been disastrous for us and I was truly blessed to have it turn out as easily as it did.

Hope I made you laugh today and appreciate your own families. I sure do love mine!